Oakland County Joint Custody – What Happens When You Mediate

You typically get involved in Oakland County joint custody mediation when the court orders you to go, or when you and the other parent agree to give it a try. Either way, the process is usually the same.

Preparation

Before attending the first session, you want to decide the issues to negotiate and the obstacles to reaching a settlement. Preparation includes choosing what you consider the best result, the next best result, and your bottom-line position. You also want to consider the strengths and weaknesses of your arguments.

Preliminary Meeting

At the first meeting, the Oakland County joint custody mediator needs to get everyone organized. This is usually a joint session where the custody mediator describes the process. The mediator will explain that his or her role is to keep the debate civilized, moderate discussions, keep the negotiations going, and bring the process to a close. The mediator may also gather basic information from each parent.

You may be asked for a brief statement of your position and a summary of your arguments supporting your position. At this point, the mediator will begin to focus the issues down to specific questions that need to be addressed. A good mediator will take control of the process and not let the discussion disintegrate into squabbling and name-calling.

Joint Sessions

After the preliminary meeting, you may return to the mediator’s office for a series of joint sessions. Depending on the mediator, these sessions may last as little as 30 minutes, or as long as two hours. And they may conclude within a few weeks, or stretch out over several months.

In these sessions, you will discuss the problems. Usually, each parent is allowed to talk without interruption and is given a chance to express concerns. Every issue is on the table during the meetings, including school involvement, discipline techniques, medical needs, and more. By letting you and the other parent talk, the Oakland County joint custody mediator seeks to help you understand each other and reach a satisfactory agreement.